You Stayed, You Gave, You Loved

For my wife...

When I said,
"Let's leave the world
you and I know,"
you didn't complain,
though I couldn't explain
the journey we were starting.
Instead of listening
to your doubts and fears,
you gave me your trust.

When I insisted
that love was more complex
than the single-minded focus
on one other being,
though you didn't understand,
it wasn't how you planned.
By my side you still stayed.

When every cell
cried out to you to say farewell,
you chose the harder path.
You picked the eye
of a savage hurricane
of paradoxical passion,
and believed in our love.

Now, looking back,
I see the heights we've climbed,
and realize without you
I'd have fallen far behind.
Because you stayed,
you gave,
you loved,
I soar to the heights.

Losing My Religion - Sneak Preview #3 - "Knots"

In the hands

of my sanctuary,

each knot tied

becomes a chain broken,

each one a worry

given up,

a weight I don't

have to carry

because I am Your captive,

bound by love,

held in place

to please Your eyes,

to sate Your flesh,

to use

or not

as You see fit,

to await

Your will.

To be free

from everything else.

For now,

only You matter.

(c) Tortured Cyclone 2014, 2016

Losing My Religion Sneak Preview #2 - "Devotional"

This piece was inspired by the Depeche Mode song, "Surrender"

Devotional

An infidel, kneeling in prayer,

to the only deity he's sure is there,

doomed to be a burnt offering

to passion's goddess,

a sacrifice in your holy bed,

prepared to be broken,

my world reshaped in your hallowed name,

wholly surrendered to your flame.

Burn me,

consume me,

with tenderness

subsume me,

grant release through ecstasy's grace,

and stamp your visage in God's place,

through the faithless door then send me,

to a cruel world bent to end me,

my fate writ like a lottery token.

My heart,

my soul,

they are your tokens

of my devotion.

Losing My Religion - Sneak Preview 1 - "Goddess Mine"

Goddess Mine

I sit and wonder
what has become of you.
Have you found
the gentleman you seek
to make your life complete?
Do you ever think
about the gentleman
who you turned away from
because he loved you too much?
The man who would
have given up his entire world
to be by your side.
He, who gave you a gift,
in his love, that he's afraid
to ever give to anyone again.
He who you shamed,
calling what you had
a fantasy, an impossibility.
Will you ever find another like me?

I pray you do.
I wish you all
the happiness you seek.

You see,
though you cast me out,
I still worship,
I still love you...

Even knowing it is
All
In
Vain...

(c) Tortured Cyclone 2015, 2016

originally published on uink.ca

The Disingenuity of the Post-and-Delete Phenomenon

You've probably seen someone who goes onto his (or her) social media or blog to troll others. This person will post something to the internet, and then quickly remove it, due to being reported for abuse and/or violation of the terms of service for the site. This person then repeats, ad nauseam.

As a writer and person who champions the cause of stopping bullying, I find this practice reprehensible. Not only does this give the troll the opportunity to continue bullying his or her targets, but it also protects them from disciplinary action by the Internet community. Also, as someone who takes pride in my work, and considers posting online to be the electronic equivalent of publishing, what sense does it make to publish and then retract?

In the offline world of publishing, there are laws that prevent slander and libel in printed media. This is why newspapers and magazines spend so much time and effort to verify information before they run with a story. There is a legal and ethical requirement for published media to do so. It is the contention that there needs to be a similar requirement for social media sites and other hosted online media outlets.

Indeed, I suggest that sites like Twitter should use their analytical ability to review the behavior of habitual offenders of site TOE. There are harassers/trolls who use the post-and-delete tactic to avoid disciplinary action by the hosting website. Even when the offending information is deleted, that information still exists in electronic form for some time. For the protection of the members of the online community, habitual offenders should be subject to disciplinary action, up to permanent suspension.

In truth, the controversial post-and-delete user is nothing more than a person who seeks self-aggrandizement at the expense of others, not a shock jock like Howard Stern. They emulate the outrageous tone of Donald Trump, without the integrity to own their words for all to see.

Exit Interview

Not too long ago, my year-long stint as a contributor to the Uink.ca blog and website came to an end.

Looking at the experience, writing for a largely erotica-based website, there were a lot of facets I could talk about: How honored I was to be asked to be a contributor; The camaraderie of a small team of writers and friends; The pleasure of working on "Whispers Entice"; The thrill of working with, inspiring and being inspired by, some fantastic writers.

I could also tell tales of the dark side: The petty power plays; The lies and hypocrisy of team members; The out-of-check egos; The lowered bar of quality for some members of the group; Being stabbed in the back and fired.

But, in the end, the year-long ride was a job. Unpaid, building my exposure as a writer, getting the word out. No one can take that from me.

I was a contributing author for an erotica website, with more than a post a week, average. The quality and quantity of my work shone there.

It was a tremendous opportunity. But opportunities often come to an end, leaving us free for new opportunities.

Uink, thank you.

(c) Tortured Cyclone 2016
@TorturdCyclone

For Camille

Yesterday was Saint Patrick's Day. Another holiday with specific cultural significance for specific ethnicities or sects of religion. No big deal, right?

Except my family came over from Ireland long before the potato famine that drove so many Irish immigrants to America in the mid-1800s. You'd never be able to tell that I'm Irish, however, if you looked at my luck.

Unlike the stereotypical Irishman, I have never displayed any good luck to speak of.In fact, I've sometimes joked that if I didn't have bad luck, I'd have no luck at all. But that all changed when I met you.

You came into this world on this day significant to my ancestors. In essence, you are the living embodiment of all of my life's good fortune. Because you love me, I am one of the luckiest of men.

You prove that I have the Luck of the Irish.